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How-to: assertiveness [tips & features of assertive behavior]

How-to: assertiveness [tips & features of assertive behavior]

How can I become more assertive and react assertively to situations? What are the characteristics of assertive behavior? What are examples of good assertive sentences and how can you become permanently assertive? This is an important property to develop, so continue reading this article …

What is Assertiveness?

Assertiveness means that you stand up for yourself and for what you believe in from peace and self-confidence . You say what you think is correct.

Why is assertiveness important?

Assertiveness is such an important quality because it allows you to stand up for yourself. Moreover, assertiveness is indispensable in your dealings with other people. The people you interact with should feel that they are dealing with an assertive and confident person, because people like to interact with confident and assertive people.

It is difficult to find good resources on assertiveness. Fortunately, you will get a list of the most important tips about assertiveness here. Below are the tips, phrases, and behavioral traits for assertiveness.

Tip 1 – Know what your values ​​are and stand up for them

Assertiveness becomes very easy when you have clear for yourself what your values ​​are.  Values ​​are the things that matter to you. Draw up a ‘personal status’ with your most important values, so that you can immediately rectify things in any situation if they violate your values.

And in fact, if people know your values ​​from the start, they won’t even cross your boundaries at all!

Moreover: especially stand up for yourself. Stand up for yourself, your values ​​and above all for your right to be yourself. If someone else wants you to be or behave differently, don’t just let that happen .

Shall I do me? Then you do you.

Tip 2 – Respect and monitor your own boundaries and in concrete terms this means: saying no

assertive tips

You respect yourself, you also expect respect from others and you guard your boundaries . Without feeling guilty. That means…

  • That you can stand up for yourself.
  • That you  don’t sacrifice yourself.
  • That you can just say no.  It’s just three letters: no! Simple, right?
  • That you don’t ‘please people’.

Tip 3 – Behave exactly this way… charismatic!

Assertiveness often means that you convey your message with a strong and clear voice . This is also a charismatic quality! Click here for very concrete tips on what you can do to become charismatic and in this way work very concretely on your assertiveness and self-confidence.

Tip 4 – Stand on the cause side, instead of the effect side

Be proactive.  This is almost synonymous with assertiveness. This means that you do not get carried away by environmental factors. In other words: you will always – almost automatically – work proactively towards a solution in every situation .

Tip 5 – Sometimes do this exercise for yourself: Walking assertively

be assertive walking

Walk to a room with many people and walk through the people without deviating from your path. Let others get out of the way for you. If you bump into them: so be it. That is a great opportunity to train your kindness charisma.

Tip 6 – Use these self-confidence tips

Here are another 49 self-confidence tips that will automatically make you more assertive.

Tip 7 – State your feelings and what you need

What do you want? What do you think? What do you feel? Let others know about this. This means that you ‘stay with yourself’, as they say so beautifully.

Why do you consider yourself so small when the entire universe is folded within you?
– Imam Ali

Tip 8 – Deal with debt

Guilt can be a strong factor that prevents you from being assertive. Process guilt and don’t feel guilty when it’s okay to be assertive. In fact, do you feel proud to stand up for yourself!

Tip 9 – Be a good questioner

When you need something, you ask for it in a confident, pleasant and positive way.

Watch this video about assertiveness

And finally affirm your assertiveness

Read this sentence out loud:

I am assertive and I am grateful to have this virtue. She is the protector of my dignity.

Do you really want to become more thoroughly assertive by working on your self-confidence? Then read this article about increasing your self-confidence.

About The Author


Hello! Thanks for reading these articles. My intention is to make happiness as simple and clear as posssible. By the way, excuse my English. I am not a native English speaker since I live in Amsterdam. Much appreciated if you use the comments to make suggestions on my grammar. See ya in another blogpost!