Daring to ask for (and accept) help: this is how!
Do you fear asking for help? Do you find it difficult to accept help? How do you ask for help at all? An excellent learning goal! In this article you will learn to ask for help. Read along…
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness
Do you never ask for help? Maybe you think that you are ‘independent and independent’ or maybe you think you will gain something else in some way …
But if you scratch your head well, you realize that you cannot gain anything from it. You don’t even win some ‘lifetime award’ called, “Nobody ever helped me!”
You don’t win extra points if you don’t ask for help. Life without help is pride before a fall. Without help it is ‘you against the world’ when it could have been ‘you and the world’ .
In general, people are eager to help you, but not everyone can sense that you need help. Give others a chance to help you – give others “the gift of giving.”
When you’re alive, you just need help. If a challenge feels like too much, it means it’s too much for you alone. All you need is extra help.
Are you climbing a mountain? Even ask the mountain to help you.
Release your blockages from asking for help
Release the following blocks for asking for help:
- Old wounds (“I don’t trust people anymore.”)
- Pride (“Asking for help is a weakness.”)
- Superiority (“Help? I’m above that.”)
- Competition instead of together
- Feeling unworthy (“I don’t want to be a burden.”)
- Cynicism (“They probably can’t help me anyway.”)
How can you let go of those blockages – or old feelings? Ironically, by welcoming them in, so they can complete their mission and leave for good. Here you can read how to process old emotions.
Additional tips to ask for help
How can you ask for help at work, in class, or with other problems? Let’s look at some powerful tips:
- Let go of the blockages from the above paragraph.
- Make it clear for yourself: what would you like help with? Consider what is currently difficult in your life. Make this concrete by answering the following questions: What would you prefer to change? What would help you benefit from? What kind of help could you use? Whose? How can this person best serve you?
- You can decide for yourself when to ask your request for help.
- Call a friend or inquire about a professional counselor.
- If you ask a friend for help, give the person the opportunity to express his / her opinion anyway. For example, you can ask, ‘How would you handle this situation? What do you think of this?’ Listen extensively to this person’s opinion.
- When you ask for help, take advantage of the other person’s benefits, never use the other person’s mercy or gratitude as a reason to help you. This only creates obligation and blame for the other. Go for future synergy. Diagnose what the other person could use and then emphasize that in your request for help.
Measurement exercise: what is your attitude to asking for help?
Do a kind of baseline measurement for yourself by answering these questions honestly. Do this exercise again in a few months to see if you have a different view of life compared to daring to ask for help.
- It is possible to ask another person for help at any time.
- Someone may find it fun and fulfilling that you ask this person for help.
- It is a sign of weakness if you ask for help.
- Asking for help is tantamount to getting help.
- It’s very pushy when you ask for something.
- I need to make sure the other person is going to say yes before I ask.
- When someone says no, feel free to ask the same person for help another time.
- You must always formulate your request for help as concretely as possible. You have to know exactly.
- It builds relationships when you ask for help.
- You really only bother people if you ask for help.
Read more about daring to ask for help
The book Shift Happens taught me that I can just ask for help. In fact, it reminded me that if you don’t ask for help, it won’t help you, and if you do ask for help, you win everything. The title of the book ‘Shift Happens’ tells us: if you ask for help, a shift will take place in your life.
To your success!